What's With All The Fuss About Soya...?

         

There is, something about Soya in Bunga – a ribbon of little shops, a gas station – Haas, Woodland Supermarket but more importantly, the cluster of insignificant bars that occupy Nadduli Trading Centre. To be candid, there isn’t much to scribble home about Nadduli’s, except of course, that the locals have re-named the main road that runs by it from Ggaba Road to ‘Siren Road’.

The Only Time Soya Has No Traffic Is Sunday At 7:30am 

Right by Haas petrol station, there is a crossroad that in the twilight, causes a traffic nightmare. Okay so Traffic-In Charge at Kabalagala Police Station makes it a point to deploy a traffic officer at the junction, but the officer, has a huge overweight belly that I doubt he would get past three squat-thrusts at the police training school in Masindi. All that Overweight Belly Officer does at that junction, is to absentmindedly flay his left arm as he calls traffic forward while in his right, he holds a walkie talkie or in Ugandan speak, a radio call.

The only time he attempts to move his overweight self, is when the sirens of the lead convoys the ferry those deemed to be important people who are hidden behind the tinted windows of their 4x4s as they drive past. Talking of siren convoys that exasperate - Top Judge in land probe, PM Rugunda’s convoy returning to town after dropping him home, anybody driving a police pick-up, police Subaru, army 4x4 – except that of affande Ivan Koreta. Suffice to say, Koreta’s driver always respects traffic regulations regardless of whether Koreta is in the ride or not. But that’s to be expected because Koreta is an officer and a gentleman too. However, there is Driver and Bodyguard of one of the members of the first family who just have no respect. Nuff said on them.

Maria. She Runs Nampeera Enterprises

One of the more popular bars is that of Nampeera’s - run by her daughter Maria. I am not sure why the crowd flocks to Nampeera’s – if it’s because of Maria’s appealing looks, the 3k beer or the pork. One of the regulars at Nampeera’s is Norman. I don’t know where Norman gets the kaboozi that he spiels out, but it’s very comical and sufficient to qualify him as an omwogezi at a kwanjula.

Norman In The Hat

As for Kalamba Man, he can’t sit still for more than three minutes and spends his time drifting between the mobile money shop, Mbabazi’s and Nampeera’s.  Olga on the other hand, we all wonder at how she never topples over in the skyscraper heels that she wears. There is also Leonard, who used to be MD at NSSF, and Musawo Benjamin who sit together with he (Leonard) harping on incessantly on something to do with farming. 

Kalamba 'Man'

Next to Nampeera’s is Mbabazi’s where the zungu’s – John and Don sit and watch the traffic go by as they drink Club beer. John never says much – perhaps because age has caught up with him and he has said everything that there is to say while, Marvin always sits alone uttering his: “Easy like a Sunday morning” catchphrase whenever he sees you.

Kizai is also a regular and whose conversations if you drop in on them, ‘seemingly’ knows just about every important person there is Kenya while Paddy, he has this tradition of buying a beer, heading back to his ride, sitting in the driver’s seat with one leg out of the window and talking endlessly on the phone.

Some Of The Soya Regulars

The Soya bars aside, one thing that draws people to the area is pork. There is Kityo who, I am sure has spent more than half of his life in the kitchen inhaling pork fumes and who is the master pork roaster while Birungi the server, walks about in some sort of daze that she most times forgets to put salt or pepper on the orders.

And folks, that’s usually how it rolls in Soya….