Once a year, The
Man With The Briefcase - Matia Kasaija that is, who am told is our minister of
finance, takes center stage. Like a strutting male peacock at Uganda Wildlife
Educational Centre in Entebbe fanning out its feather when it sees a suitable
mate, Kasaija holds out a briefcase – usually on the steps of parliament for
all to see. Of course, there is a media frenzy as pictures are taken for the
front pages of the newspapers for in that briefcase, there is something called The
National Budget.
And for the next
couple of hours at the podium, in a monotone voice, Kasaija will tell us his
reasons for increasing taxes on say sugar, fuel and airtime. But budget reading
is not for the sole preserve of Kasaija. At kwanjula’s and wedding meetings,
all those who attend, listen keenly as Chairman reads out the budget. By the
way, can I transgress a tad? There are now fundraising meetings for The Kid passing
his or hers S4 and S6 exams, graduating from campus and soon we will having
them for when The Kid graduates from nursery school into P1!
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| Matia Kasaija - The Man With The National Budget |
Getting back, the
last wedding meeting I attended was a couple of years ago. Let’s call him
Daniel Musoke for sake of it. Daniel was intent on marrying Susan – especially
since they had been living together for a number of years and have two children
between them.
When Chairman
presented the budget at the first wedding meeting, it was a rather lengthy one
that traversed the best part of four pages. Quickly scrawling through it, there
were the usual wedding requirements – cars, reception food and drink,
photography and so on. But sitting back and analyzing it with more scrutiny,
there was something amiss.
The first two
sections of the budget were dedicated to the needs of Bride and Groom that,
included everything from suits, haircuts, wedding dress for Bride and whatever
else that was required to make her oomph on the day.
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| Should we Be Paying for The Brides Lingerie? |
But it was item
number 6 that really perturbed. It was listed as, and wait for it, wait for it:
“knickers and bra for Bride” – along with an estimated cost of sh130k or so if
I can properly recall. It bothered because knickers and bra for Bride are
something private and should not have been listed on the budget at all. I mean,
why would Daniel want everybody to know that Bride will be wearing underwear of
130k on the day of the wedding?
Another thing
that disturbed, if Daniel couldn’t afford to buy Susan knickers and bras, and
instead resorted begging at a wedding meeting for his friends to bail him out,
what does that say about him? But worse, as Chairman read out the budget, and
it came to that item, I glanced up at Susan and she didn’t seem to be bothered
at all – almost like it was normal.
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| Surely The Bride Should Buy Her Own Shoes, Gomesi & Changing Dress |
As the meeting
wore on, Chairman invited us to contribute and pledge where we saw fit and in a
flash, my hand shot up. “Yes TB, you want to make a contribution or you have a
suggestion to make” he asked. With that, I rose to my feet and without any
thought, I said something along the lines of: “Mr. Chairman, having looked at
the budget, all items are pertinent to making the wedding a success. I also
think the most important thing we have to consider, is the issue of Bride’s underwear.
It would be most unfortunate if on the day, she turned up at her wedding minus
those items. Therefore I pledge to pay for them”
There was more
than a ripple of laughter along with snide comments of: “Mr. Chairman, does TB
intend to be there when Bride is dressing up just to make sure she’s wearing
the underwear he bought?”
Pictures: New Vision, ugandaweddingsmoments.blogspot.com
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