When The Old Man Calls For The Malwa Straw

The Straw. Old Man retired from the civil service – I think. I say I think, because he wears vests – you know the ones with the holes in them that look like fishermen’s nets? In his dialogues, when he talks about somebody, he never says, Timothy Bukumunhe as is the norm, but, Bukumunhe Timothy which, is indicative of a lengthy spell in the civil service.

M7: Uganda's Top Civil Servant

Old Man is blessed with seven children – six girls and a boy, the boy being the eldest. Over the years, the girls have bloomed from knee length sock wearing young girls with multitudes of pimples on their faces to the fine women that they are today. With Old Woman, they raised the girls well, gave them a good education and taught them exceptional lady becoming manners.

Since retirement, Old Man sits on his verandah - soaking up the breeze, watching the leaves from the acacia tree fluster to the ground and occasionally, calling Old Woman to pick up an avocado that has ripened and fallen to the ground. All this he does while sipping malwa which, Old Woman has diligently prepared with pride.

The Malwa Pot

With the children having come of age and moved out, they have, especially the girls, formed alliances with suitors who want to walk them down the aisle. With that intention, there therefore is a need for Suitor to meet Old Man and Old Woman and present credentials amongst other things.

But before we get there, there is a need to understand the significance of The Straw in Old Man’s household. The Straw takes center stage. It’s the malwa straw. It’s sacred and it holds the home together. On the very rare occasion Old Man calls out to his wife asking her to bring a straw for Suitor who has visited, it’s something not to be taken lightly but, with more than a degree of pride and honour. It means he has embraced and accepted you into his home as a genuine friend and one who is more than apt enough to marry Daughter.

Straws In A Malwa Pot

When Eldest Daughter took Suitor home, Old Man was on the verandah with his malwa pot. While Suitor spoke to Old Man – a conversation riddled with voluminous awkward silences, he called out to Old Woman: “Bring tea for our visitor.” With that, Eldest Daughter knew Suitor was not embraced. Regardless, she still married Suitor against Old Man’s wishes. But five years later, all Suitor gets when he takes the kids to visit, is tea but never the coveted prize – The Straw.

Men Partaking Of Malwa

When time came for TB (not me) to make the trip to Old Man’s house in Najjera, he was, already aware of The Straw. He found Old Man picking up avocado and before he could say his helloes, Old Man asked if he knew how many species of avocado there were in the world and where the name avocado derives from. Obviously, Old Man knew TB was no food scientist to know the answers, and that he was a mere PR manager for an energy company.

Resuming his malwa as they talked, he called out to Old Woman: “Bring a beer for our guest.” That sinking feeling crept in. Once the beer was polished off, Old Man again called her, but this time: “Bring the straw with the blue tip - you know the one I keep in the cabinet?” And when Old Man presented TB with The Straw, Old Woman pulled a chair, sat between Old Man and Daughter, clutched both their hands tightly and let out a huge sigh of relief that a wedding is in the making.

Old Man has one daughter who is still single. There is a reason for that. She shares her father’s deepest sentiments about The Straw. Hmm, I expect she will remain single for a while to come.  

PICTURE CREDITS: monitor.co.ug, ugpulse.com, newvision.co.ug